So every week or so I do a thing. I comb thru the notices and updates to find out what movies are being made in my area. Sometimes its a little, some times its a lot, and mostly its a lot of pain in my ass. BUT it is essential to finding work in the film industry, unless you know alot of people who make decisions concerning hiring. I have alot of friends from past movies, but no one high enough to give me a job in an art department. I had a friend in that position once, and she got me hired as an assistant art director for The Sorcerer's Apprentice. But tragically, that bubble burst like the job market, when the movie finished, and now I've plinko'd down to the bottom tiers once again. So today, mac on lap, tea in hand, Im going to try to worm my way onto a film. I've tried to study in my mind, movies of success I've seen since childhood, but the logic doesnt seem to apply to real world situations. In movies to get onto a sweet gig you have to:

A. accidentally socialize with the boss, or boss type figure, and tell him his company is crap, and then sit back as he takes notice of your moxy and offers you a job designing toys, or writing jingles.

B. Be in the right place when the right person either dies, or misses an appointment, then take their place. This is a time sensitive venture and you should plan your admission speech soon, in preparation of the banquet or gala in which the hot reporter/bitch co-worker will announce your sham to the world.

C. Make up a person more qualified then you by doing the following, make a fake profile on your computer, look around your filthy apartment for a name ie; Mr Foldgers, Mrs. Multiuse, Johnny Netflix, or Dr. Newspaper, then pose at their assistant.

D. Meet a magical mannequin that only comes to life when she's alone with you.

I hope this information was helpful and if it gets anyone a job with status, feel free to offer me a job.